If you have seen Kill Bill, there is a great scene where Uma Thurman is trying to get her body back to moving after a 4 year coma. That was me. My will was strong and I just wanted to get out of the recovery room, into my hospital room where I can start the process of ending my stay there.
A whole new me came about on November 14. Laying in the recovery room, I really wanted to see my new son, so I forced with every energy that I had to get my legs moving. This is a hard task as anesthesia wears off slowly. About 20 minutes in there, the nurse wanted to see how I was progressing. I ended up moving my whole legs and crossed them. Her face was shocked and she said "oookay! That is a first. Wow!"
That is what I needed to hear. If I can do that, I can recover from anything. Seeing Jack later that day was my extra boost. Never did I want more than to just jump, hold him and run down the halls with him. His little face made me ache to be at home and to just relax with him. I hated when the nurses and the doctors came in, cause that just took away the extra seconds that I needed to be with Jack. After the second night, when Jack was told that I still needed to be at the hospital, he cried and said "I want to be with Mama." Those words hurt me and when he left, I just looked at Charlie, who was sleeping in his bed, and just let out a huge sob. I cried as if someone had died, and this sadness that I couldn't be with Jack was unbelievable. It was huge and there was no way that someone was going to tell my son that Mama needed to stay at the hospital another night and not with him.
The morning of day 3 came and when I woke up, the first thing that I thought was - I am getting out of here today.
I convinced the docs that I was walking ok, and I was. The docs that looked at Charlie said he was healthy and looked great, which was another incentive for us to leave. There was really no need to stay so at 1 pm, we were discharged. I still hobbled a bit, but with some regular Motrin at home, I would be ok.
And here we are two weeks later, the pain is almost gone,my back is recovering nicely, my limbs work once again, we have Charlie on a sleeping schedule and I get to see my little Jack every day.
Jack - you were my recovery. All the pain meds in the world wouldn't have done what your spirit did to me at the hospital. Thank you for being my good little boy while I was away. I am and will always be so proud of you.
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