The Sacrafices

While this blog has been mostly a glowing one, I mean even when I wrote about Jack's teething experiences, it didn't sound that bad, I realize that I have not written enough on what Brian and I go through ourselves.

I still hate that I have to work every day. Lottery, when will you come into my life? Our mornings are very hectic in that both Brian and I are running around getting dressed, trying to get some breakfast in our mouths, while we try to change Jack and give him at least a cup of milk before he goes to the specific daycare of the day -whether it's my parents or Miss Ronna. It's a horrible feeling that I have to give my son a quick hello and kiss before I leave for work. Perhaps I am still too new of a parent to shake that guilty feeling away. That guilty feeling of leaving.
My son wants to be with his parents when he wakes up. He wants to play with them, yet they take him somewhere and they leave for the next 9 hours. This sounds very dramatic to some, but as a new parent, there is no better feeling in the world than to be loved and wanted as soon as your child opens their eyes. Now that Jack has been waking up later and later, that is great for the weekends. But for our workday mornings, it sucks. Plain sucks. Sometimes I did not get my Jack morning kiss. And I curse work for the whole day. I am thankful for having work. I am not thankful that it stinks to work. The double edged sword.

With that said, new choices are always coming for Brian for work. He sometimes is faced with the dilemma of how much work is too much. For a photographer running your own business, there is no such thing as too much. In fact, Brian has been having a great year in regards to acquiring new clients and keeping current clients. But there are also choices of working all weekend, working nights and leaving his family to spend the whole day without him. I always tell him that it is ok - Brian is not only working for himself , and working for his family. There is no argument there. Although I would love it if Brian was with us every weekend and every night, there is a great benefit for him to work that much.

As parents, we all do what we can for each other. Brian and I are learning this every day. I think that as working parents, we know what is truly important and there are things that we do not take for granted. We don't need gifts to tell each other we love each other. That hug and kiss will do just fine. Even if it is for a quick second and then we dash out the door.